Now that we’ve learned a bit about what the term financial crisis actually means, it’s important to understand how to respond to these situations. After all, if we become over-emotional, lash out, overreact, or otherwise respond wrongly, it can do a considerable amount of damage to the marriage. Our goal is to get out of debt, not create so much tension that the two of you feel that you must divorce, so coping with the crisis is absolutely critical.

Here are just a few ways to cope with financial crises in your marriage. They are some of the most important, at least in my experience.

1. Talk About Everything

I don’t mean mope around and predict doom and gloom over your home, finances and family as far as the situation is concerned. However, you have to communicate with each other, openly and honestly, until a workable solution is determined. Pray together first, during, and even after the crisis, and set goals toward reaching the most viable solution. If you can’t figure something out together, consider the help of a marriage counsellor in addition to our extensive information here at God’s Money Matters. Commit to working through it as a couple, together in all things, and never (ever) let the dreaded d-word (divorce) enter the conversation, even if you’re hurt and angry.

2. Avoid Blame

 At this point, it’s really easy to start pointing fingers and assigning blame, but this can never help with the solution to the problem. It only exacerbates hard feelings and creates tension in your marriage. The financial crisis is not often solely one person’s fault, rarely predictable, so there’s honestly no point in playing the blame game. Instead, focus on the solution, not determining who was more or less responsible for the crisis you are experiencing. Reflect together, without letting emotions take over, and pray. Have I mentioned that praying together is important? 🙂

3.Turn to God Together

If you’re serving the Lord together, this is a perfect time to rekindle your relationship with Him or take it to another level with your spouse. Pray and seek God, consider a serious time of fasting, but don’t forget to thank Him when He reveals the solution. You might not like it, and it might not be a lot of fun, but it’s always the right choice to trust God during trying times.  It’s also a good time to ask if God is trying to teach you something that will benefit you (or others) in the long-term.

If your spouse is an unbeliever, pray harder than ever so that he or she will see the difference that tuning in to your faith can make when times are hard.

4. Stay in Control

While it feels like the perfect time to panic, this is what those people making the harassing phone calls want you both to do, because it’s when you’re most likely to give up, get a loan, or max out a credit card…just to make the calls stop. Digging into a deeper hole is almost never a viable option, so instead of answering your phone every time, just turn it off. Let voicemail deal with the creditors, once you’ve had an initial conversation with each one wherein you explain the situation and seek help. Don’t just refuse to speak from the onset; it’ll make problems worse. In addition, you could lose out on a chance to get help from some creditors.  Many are willing to negotiate a settlement if you communicate with them appropriately.

Here’s a Scripture to study together:
“Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” –1 Corinthians 13:7 (NLT)

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